Nothing much has changed, really.
I went into the staff meeting this morning. We always go around the table and give status on our projects. Today, everybody’s status was the same – “braaaains”. Except for me. I said, “The project is going well, I’ll have some new documentation by the end of the week.” Everybody looked at me like I was an idiot.
At lunch, I sat alone in the break room, eating my Lean Cuisine. Everybody else sat at a different table across from me, eating brains from their lunch boxes. (Except for Joan, who’s watching her weight too. She was eating Lean Brains. We used to be diet buddies, but I’m guessing that’s not going to be the case anymore.) They very pointedly didn’t talk to me, they just had their own little conversation that clearly excluded me. At one point one of them said “braaains” and then they all looked at me and laughed. I tried to laugh like I got the joke, but I’m pretty sure the joke was on me.
As I type, Jennifer is standing outside my cube talking with Danielle. Jennifer always used to talk about her gross medical problems. Now they’re talking about brains, but I’m pretty sure that Danielle is still grossed out – I haven't heard her say “eww”, exactly, but her responses definitely aren’t the enthusiastic “braaaains” I normally hear from her. I stuck my head out to ask them to keep it down, and they walked away, muttering insultingly about my brains. I think that's what they were saying, anyway.
So I’ve been practicing answering the phone with “braaains” instead of “hello”. I’m thinking maybe on the way home, I might stop by the store and see if I can pick up some brains. I mean, maybe they don’t taste *too* bad. Maybe I can get used to the flavor. But if I want to get ahead in this company, I’m going to need to do a better job of fitting in.
“Braaaains.” God, it’s like being in high school all over again. *sigh*